I can really relate to much that is said here. It’s so true, that I would also not have wanted to be diagnosed and pointed out as different and separate. I started public school, when special education was undergoing a lot of changes with mainstreaming kids, and I was in speech therapy for a while. I was also in gifted classes, and it was hard enough being called out as needing speech therapy (which didn’t work, by the way) and gifted classes. But being identified as autistic… I think that would have added to my overwhelm.
I’ve been doing a lot of reflection lately and something I thought about was “how life would have been different had I known about my Autism as a child”.
I was a little angry at the world about this – that not one person picked it up! And I let this thought anger and distress me. I let myself feel sorry for myself and all of the “lost generation”. About all the misunderstandings and struggles we all faced at various levels with no explanation.
I can’t conclude whether this is a bad thing or good thing for anyone else but myself. So my personal view on the matter is that although I felt this sadness and anger about it –I am glad I didn’t know. This may go against the grain of the majority, but allow me to explain..
It’s one thing to “feel” different to…
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Autistic Ultra 